you've made it this far...

Recently I reached out to a new transplant who had posted a search for new friends - he's a new expat and relocated here with his wife, a Czech woman, who has since reconnected with her old friends and left him to fend for himself. I've met quite a few people who have gone through that situation and it's been rough on all of them. I wrote and told him about some open events - mixers, parties, etc, that he might want to check out; opportunities to connect with new people and maybe check out a new place or two.  I wasn't actually going to be at the next few, but they're open and meant specifically for people in his situation - strangers looking to form ties in their new community.

The response I received, in summary, was that he'd heard of these social groups before but really couldn't be bothered as he hadn't seen anything that appealed to him just yet or fit in his price range. That, in my opinion, was unfortunate. I'd referred him to at least one local group that held regular mixers all over the city on a regular basis. Rarely is the location the appeal; it's the opportunity to meet new people. Never is there a cover charge or any other required cost.  Maybe he didn't want to go to a restaurant/bar/club/jazz club/hike/walk/bike/play volleyball/badminton/football/take a day trip/tour a castle/visit a winery/etc. Maybe he didn't want to pay for a beer/water/wine/soda/food/other optional purchase while he was out... Maybe. But asking for info about a social gathering and then shutting down an invitation to a social gathering, when you don't have contacts or connections is, in my opinion, ridiculous and self-defeating

Here's my tip for potential expats - you can't shut out options. Not as an expat. Not if you want to survive. You will do things you don't find immediately attractive. You will meet people you don't mesh with on a higher level. You will sit through gatherings for a few minutes wondering what you're doing. You will do these things and more. Why? Because somewhere, at sometime, you will meet people who share interests with you, who you do connect with, who you want to be around and laugh with and who you truly enjoy. But until you step out and engage in what is offered to the group you won't be able to connect with the right individuals. I wish it were otherwise at times. I really do. I wish that events and such were tailor-made but they're not. And until you join and get involved and create your own events that are likely to attract similarly minded people you'll be stuck at home wishing you knew someone you could connect with.

I'm not trying to be harsh or overly critical.  i want this guy to succeed here. Just as I want any other person to. I've gone through the loneliness and it's miserable. But you've got to be willing to participate. If you've moved around the world don't hesitate when it comes to stepping out the door.

poor little journalist in training

Earlier this week I heard a gripe. It went something like this, "Ugh! Class is cancelled this week. I have to go to the film festival instead." (That would be Jeden Svet - One World. It is an international documentary film festival and well worth the trip, even if you don't have a teacher making you go.)

My response was a little cheerier than appreciated in the moment. It was something like, oh that's nice, are you going as a class or on your own, have to write a paper on it?... along those lines. And was met with another exasperated response. "We each have to go on our own. I have to pick which film to see and then interview the director about it. UGH!"

Isn't that sort of ideal when you're a journalism major? Here, student - pick one of these fascinating topics, don't go to school, go watch a movie and then interview the key participants?

Is my concept wrong?

kitchen wishin'

My daughter has expressed a desire for an apple corer. And better pots, pans and knives. And better lighting in the kitchen.

I'm so proud of her.

The kid is cooking

She finally got started on her Christmas present - private cooking lessons. Her reaction was excellent! She mentioned the trepidation she had while making the meal - mixed green salad with a vinaigrette, mushroom risotto and a creme caramel - as the vinaigrette had a lot of mustard, which she doesn't like, and the mushroom risotto had, well, mushrooms - another food she doesn't really care for.

When I asked her about it this evening her face lit up with sheer amazement - she gushed... it was so good. She loved it, all of it, even the stuff she doesn't like was just incredible. And it was better than "restaurant food".

And - it was easy. Really easy. She couldn't believe how easy.  Minimal ingredients, minimal prep time. And cheap.  The first step of the lesson was shopping together for the ingredients. They spent 200ck in total and she said the used less than half.

I'm really grateful she enjoyed it. One on one time with a stranger can be hard, especially when it's a teaching environment.  Fortunately she had a good time and learned something and seems quite amenable to completing the sessions... which is a really good thing as this was just the first - she's got 11 more lessons to go, 3 times a week for a month.

I'm looking forward to when she cooks dinner next.

super cheap and effective - although confusing - Homolka... another hospital

So earlier I'd referred to a little surgery I needed. It was minor, nothing important, but the chain of events and the costs are what I want to cover here.

I had something on my skin so I went to the dermatologist. It was near my eye so he sent me to the optometrist - who sent me back to the dermatologist since it was on my skin. The derma guy said don't worry and sent me home. That was a few months ago.

Things changed so I went back. Again he wanted to send me to the optometrist but we'd been down that road and I said no.  The dermatologist said it had changed too much and he couldn't manage it himself so had to refer me elsewhere, I said fine.  He said it would have to be a cosmetic surgeon and I said "Great! Let's get this done."  Then he paused for a bit before writing out instructions.  He sent me down the hall and told me to look for the sign that said "Stomatochirgurie".  It's a weird looking word. It means, as I understood it, dental surgery. I asked him to explain why he was sending me there and he said - don't worry about the name, it's just a name, a funny name, but they can help you. He never translated it for me but I was aware. I thought maybe they shared surgery space with the cosmetic people or something.  I was wrong.

I walked down to the window in the wall and gave them my papers. The nurses had me wait, then pulled me in to see the doctor who poked me in the eye twice, said "no problem!" before the nurses pulled me back out the doorway (and I do quite literally mean pulled).  They set up an appointment. The Dr's card indicated he was an oral, jaw and face surgeon. I figured it out - the surgery was on my face.  Forget that it was my skin, it was on my face.... the dermatologist's logic was impeccable.

I went back 2 weeks later for the surgery (as already detailed).

When I returned to Homolka for the surgery I checked in at the main area and paid my 30kc. The receptionist sent me on a wild goose chase - I ended up in areas I shouldn't have been and was thoroughly lost so I returned to the stomatochirgurie hoping they'd be able to tell me where to go... turns out that's where I needed to be.  They had their own separate reception - the downstairs people sent me in circles as they didn't know where I was supposed to go - so I had to pay another 30kc.  I did, quite happily, and then waited.

When it was done, they told me to come back the following day, a Wednesday and that I would need to return again on Friday.  I arrived quite early on Wednesday, eager to make sure that I hadn't accidentally ripped out the stitches in my sleep - as it sure felt like I had.  When I went to check in they told me to sit down without having taken my payment.  I did.  I waited, they saw me, I left. No fee for the follow up.

I went back on Friday as instructed, to get the bandage changed, and again make sure I hadn't ripped out the stitches.... again, no fee, no registration, it was part of the initial service.

I had to go back again on Tuesday to get the stitches out.  And again, no fee.

All and all I paid twice as much as I should have for a minor surgery and 3 follow-up visits.  I could have gotten a refund on my initial payment but I forgot to take my receipt down after the surgery. I would have gladly paid a hundred times what I did for the care I received.  Considering that each 30kc payment was just about $1.60 it wasn't a substantial amount. The quality of the care I received  was excellent. Definitely not the structure I'm used to, but excellent care.  Even if I had a dental surgeon performing cosmetic surgery.  I never fully understood why I was in that department.  I wondered for a little bit, then I just stopped caring - I knew I could get it fixed if it were bad but had faith that they weren't out to destroy my face and would try to take some care.  And they did. The scarring is truly minimal.  It's barely noticeable when I look in the mirror and once it heals a bit more the pinkness will go away and I won't even be able to see it.

ridiculous wording

Today I had to write a responsive letter to a stranger. Although I haven't met him what he'd sent was of particular interest to me. He'd signed his letter with his full title so I used it in my greeting.

How ridiculous is this?

Dear Prof. Dr. Dr.

Karneval Parade in Ptuj, Slovenia aka... all the cowbells in the world

Ptuj (pronounced Puh-toohey, sort of like you're spitting out something foul) is a rather small town in Slovenia but is the sight of the largest Karneval celebration in the country. It has a whole weekend of parties, parades and festivities. I took weekend trip with some friends - Friday in Brno and Saturday/Sunday in Ptuj - back in Prague before midnight Sunday night.

Saturday night was a large party with a few thousand people (I was number 2659 and there were hundreds behind me in life) all in incredible costumes, live bands and a lot of happiness. Sunday was a giant parade - not only the participants but most of the observers were in costume.

Traditionally there is a character, known as a kurent, which also looks a lot like a Native American kachina, that is the most popular costume of choice. Those who wear it train all year to participate - the clothing and hopping and dancing, the shaking and rattling - the sheer number of people in the "tribe" - it's all quite overwhelming.

Here is the tiniest little bit of the experience. It's a bit loud so adjust accordingly.

And I doubt you'll ever call for 'More cowbell' again!!