The cheek kissing thing

The whole cheek kissing thing is very confusing for me. For some reason I was thinking about it just an instant ago and so decided to write it out.

First - I don't kiss Americans. No, it's not because they're American but it is at the same time - it feels artificial to me... not part of our culture. So unless, and there are very few, you're a friend, a true friend, who has lived here a while and is now more European than American I won't kiss your cheeks - unless we're in a group of people and I kiss everyone else too.

Second - how many times??? It's taken me forever to come up with an answer for that! I have friends from so many cultures and it seems to fluctuate - some people kiss once, most twice, and yet a few plant three on me when I go. I can't keep track! So the answer is this - I kiss everyone, everyone I kiss, twice.

When to kiss and when to shake? That's hard too. I've got it down sorta like this (while it's set in type it's not set in stone): when I meet you I will shake - sometimes, depending on how we're meeting I will get kissed too which usually catches me by surprise so I end up offering a cheek without returning a kiss; when I leave, depending on the dynamic - formal or business then I will shake, through friends or acquaintences yet we've had no or very little interaction I will shake - and occasionally get kissed and so return the kiss as well; anyone I spent time with, connected with, and really enjoyed talking to - it's a kiss.

The exception to the intro shake is when I meet my friends' families... they tend to give and receive kisses upon introduction.

It's been nearly 6 months and I'm finally getting a grasp on the kiss-shake thing. I really need to increase my learning curve.