I had my morning class today - the one with the outspoke older woman - a successful scientist and a seemingly strong woman. She's a bio-chemistry professor, or something like that, in her late 60's I believe. I've written about her before. She likes to talk.
Today the conversation was more personal - not just life views and opinions and such but she asked me about my relationships. I answered by telling her I don't have a boyfriend. I don't. I have lots of friends here but not anyone I am involved with. She told me that's not normal. A woman needs a man. You need someone to go to the movies or the theater with. I stated I have many single male friends and we do those sorts of things - go out dancing, to parties, and events. We're friends.
She let me know that is not enough. She told me about her life - she was a young widowed mother and remarried in her 40s. We briefly touched on some past relationships, shared some poor choices we've made, I talked about the men I've met here and how they're different than what I'm used to - way more direct, more demanding, charming yet selfish... and then she reinforced for me how different sexual companions are thought of over here - there are so many people I know who have sexual relationships with married men, and it's acceptable. Men and women - and it's not great, like it's not advertised, but it's not frowned upon either.
Then she brought up health issues (we'd been talking about cancer and other ills). Her husbands (a double widow) both died of cancer, as did her mother and an aunt. She talked about stress being the root of cancer - she believes it is some sort of event or psychological trauma which causes the disruption in the normal cells that leads to cancer. That, and other things, but that, stress, is one of the big ones for her.
And from there she got very serious and let me know I need to find a man, imperfect is ok, selfish is fine if we don't life together, he doesn't need to be a boyfriend, he can be married, whatever... but I need to find a man cause I need a healthy sex life so I won't get cancer.
That puts a whole new spin on things. :-)
4 comments:
so, i confused. this woman wants you to have sex so you will not get cancer. yet both of her husbands died of cancer? did they not have sex? i don't mean to poke-fun at the woman or the loss of her spouses. i've seen the pain and sadness of cancer. but still, i'm confused.
Stress is her underlying belief as a cause of cancer.
Her first husband was also a scientist yet after the invasion he was blacklisted and forced to work as a janitor - he was subjected to a lot of stuff and the stress was overwhelming. Shortly thereafter he got cancer and died.
Her second husband was much older and had cancer for many years, finally succumbing when he was 80 or 81.
I think her point was that sex is part of a healthy life and that it needs to be a part of life to be a balanced life.... and help keep stress in check.
I think. I really don't know for sure. That was the impression I got.
Yeah, I got the same stern talking to from a psychic four years ago, which really freaked me out. Not that I've done much about it.
I think I've had sex about as many times in my lifetime as doctors recommend is healthy for you to have a YEAR.
seems to me she's the one who needs to get laid!
FagettaBoutit!!
You are beautiful and sexy and men over there are chauvinist pigs~!
wait till you find a man that you can really love.
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