Wednesday, February 10, 2010

unclear on your concept

The kid was relaying some thoughts/feeling/etc about her health class... she's discouraged that the teacher is focused on calorie counting, fat intake, and stuff like that, as she feels it's to a degree beyond what teen girls need reinforced... that there is value in nutritional awareness but that it's too much of a focal point... that and the teacher mispronounces words and noone understands what she's talking about... however, NOT the point here!

The topic was eating disorders and the girls were talking about who and how to talk about eating disorders... it was suggested by one teacher and reinforced by another that they not talk to boys about any eating disorder concerns as it's too emotionally intimate.

I can think of plenty of reasons for girls not to talk about boys about deeply personal mental/emotional/eating disorders - most based around the fact that high school boys just don't know how to deal with problems they can't fix combined with the fact that they don't really know how to talk to girls - but if there were a boy and a girl who were such close friends that the girl wanted his advice or input surround her concerns regarding her friend or her own potential eating disorder, well, I for one wouldn't discourage her from turning to someone she felt close with and whom she believed would be willing and able to be present, listen, and appropriately respond.

I'm not sure why the label "too emotionally intimate" is applied to this topic, but I feel it's a disservice - girls are constantly having reinforced unrealistic body-images and ideals and if they are struggling I just don't see the sense in discouraging them from confiding or reaching out to friends. I don't think, if the concern is that this emotional intimacy would lead to sexual intimacy that a 16 year old guy is going to hear "I stick my finger down my throat every day after lunch cause I hate myself" and be turned on. Especially not with these kids.

I really hope this type of guidance is given a bit more consideration before the next group of kids comes through.

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