It just turned midnight, the kid is sleeping and I have finished editing my work for the night... I have more new assignments to work on but am taking a bit of a break.
For nothing new happening I have a fair amount to say... first - she is only here for a few more days and then has a flight back to CA... and I'm not ready for that. I actually had a daydream last night about being home during the summer, driving to Blockbuster on Yulupa and picking out movies then walking in to Whole Foods for some fresh fruit and for a fruit and movie dinner.... which is rather odd as we don't use that Blockbuster, ever, but the feeling behind it - the normalcy of our summer time evening - lots of fresh juicy berries and melon and a movie in a nice cool house late at night... that isn't something I get to be a part of this summer. No DDR competitions, no Wii marathons... no fireworks and BBQs at Emilies, no sushi or Wednesday Night Market with D, no RRBC with Jodi and BR and Scott and Mike and Becky, no Health and Harmony, no fair, no horse races, no trips to the beach, girls night at the ocean, no Grandma Julie in August, no August grandparents' birthday parties, no day trips to Calistoga or Harbin, no birthday baseball games - no Giants at all, no San Francisco for that matter... none of the things that mean summer to me. And most of all - no kid.
And that's the hardest part. She has grown so much I wish I could be there as you all become reacquainted with her. She has such a full life here and is so busy that it feels like I hardly get to see her anymore - it's a lot of conversations in passing or when one of us is half asleep - or should be sleeping....
I've started wondering if staying here for the summer might have been the wrong decision for me. To be quite honest I miss my Dad. We don't always talk a lot, but I love him a lot, and I like being around him. Obviously I miss my Mom too, but we have an email/phone tag connection and can talk to talk and feel connected and find things to talk about for an hour to two - literally. Not everyone can do that - nor would I want to do that with everyone. I miss by brother too - and he's going to be back in town for the summer. My other brother and his wife are expecting their newest child any day and their oldest is a full-fledged communicating person now, which he wasn't when we left (person yes, freely communicating, not so much)- and I am obviously missing those too. And my sister will be back and forth visiting with her little boy who is nearing 1 1/2 and growing faster than I can remember being possible.
Not quite home sick - but maybe family sick... however that doesn't look a thing like what I mean...
Second - in my writing class we've been lucky enough to go to the Prague Writers Festival... and once again I'm smitten by someone unexpected - in case you forgot, last time I went to one of these big lecture event thingys I came away with a huge crush on Gary Kasparov... this time there are two.... they shall remain unnamed for now... as you who have been there may mock me - relentlessly and rightfully so. My crushes are insignificant... they're temporary infatuations with people who have struck me as stunning in one way or another... in this case, strong bold and brave men ready and willing to speak their minds and share their thoughts and who choose to do so with grace and dignity. If you were at the events I was at you may have a clue... if you weren't there you wouldn't know who I was talking about anyway... I didn't until fairly recently (not as recent at yesterday or even last week but still relatively recently). Anyway - it's nice to once again have exposure to stunningly creative and aware people. More of what I crave, more of why I'm here.
Third - I had a blast in pre-school today and so did the kids. We played charades... or rather, they did. I gave them each cards with animals that we've been studying and then they got to act out the animal... and we'd have to guess what they were. They had a blast - and it was fun. Always nice when those two go hand in hand. We also learned the names of the playground toys and played a racing game - I'd call out the equipment and they'd run, jump, walk, skip, go backwards as fast as they could to get there - and then they could play on it until I called out the next piece of equipment and the next little instruction on how to get there... again, cute kids having fun and learning. It was a good day.
Fourth - i'm enjoying my class and wish it was longer and more in depth. really wish that.
For nothing new happening I have a fair amount to say... first - she is only here for a few more days and then has a flight back to CA... and I'm not ready for that. I actually had a daydream last night about being home during the summer, driving to Blockbuster on Yulupa and picking out movies then walking in to Whole Foods for some fresh fruit and for a fruit and movie dinner.... which is rather odd as we don't use that Blockbuster, ever, but the feeling behind it - the normalcy of our summer time evening - lots of fresh juicy berries and melon and a movie in a nice cool house late at night... that isn't something I get to be a part of this summer. No DDR competitions, no Wii marathons... no fireworks and BBQs at Emilies, no sushi or Wednesday Night Market with D, no RRBC with Jodi and BR and Scott and Mike and Becky, no Health and Harmony, no fair, no horse races, no trips to the beach, girls night at the ocean, no Grandma Julie in August, no August grandparents' birthday parties, no day trips to Calistoga or Harbin, no birthday baseball games - no Giants at all, no San Francisco for that matter... none of the things that mean summer to me. And most of all - no kid.
And that's the hardest part. She has grown so much I wish I could be there as you all become reacquainted with her. She has such a full life here and is so busy that it feels like I hardly get to see her anymore - it's a lot of conversations in passing or when one of us is half asleep - or should be sleeping....
I've started wondering if staying here for the summer might have been the wrong decision for me. To be quite honest I miss my Dad. We don't always talk a lot, but I love him a lot, and I like being around him. Obviously I miss my Mom too, but we have an email/phone tag connection and can talk to talk and feel connected and find things to talk about for an hour to two - literally. Not everyone can do that - nor would I want to do that with everyone. I miss by brother too - and he's going to be back in town for the summer. My other brother and his wife are expecting their newest child any day and their oldest is a full-fledged communicating person now, which he wasn't when we left (person yes, freely communicating, not so much)- and I am obviously missing those too. And my sister will be back and forth visiting with her little boy who is nearing 1 1/2 and growing faster than I can remember being possible.
Not quite home sick - but maybe family sick... however that doesn't look a thing like what I mean...
Second - in my writing class we've been lucky enough to go to the Prague Writers Festival... and once again I'm smitten by someone unexpected - in case you forgot, last time I went to one of these big lecture event thingys I came away with a huge crush on Gary Kasparov... this time there are two.... they shall remain unnamed for now... as you who have been there may mock me - relentlessly and rightfully so. My crushes are insignificant... they're temporary infatuations with people who have struck me as stunning in one way or another... in this case, strong bold and brave men ready and willing to speak their minds and share their thoughts and who choose to do so with grace and dignity. If you were at the events I was at you may have a clue... if you weren't there you wouldn't know who I was talking about anyway... I didn't until fairly recently (not as recent at yesterday or even last week but still relatively recently). Anyway - it's nice to once again have exposure to stunningly creative and aware people. More of what I crave, more of why I'm here.
Third - I had a blast in pre-school today and so did the kids. We played charades... or rather, they did. I gave them each cards with animals that we've been studying and then they got to act out the animal... and we'd have to guess what they were. They had a blast - and it was fun. Always nice when those two go hand in hand. We also learned the names of the playground toys and played a racing game - I'd call out the equipment and they'd run, jump, walk, skip, go backwards as fast as they could to get there - and then they could play on it until I called out the next piece of equipment and the next little instruction on how to get there... again, cute kids having fun and learning. It was a good day.
Fourth - i'm enjoying my class and wish it was longer and more in depth. really wish that.
1 comment:
Love you my sweet sister.
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