Wednesday, October 20, 2010

my final parent-teacher conference

This is the very last parent-teacher conference of my parenting adventure. Way to end it on a high note, Kid!

Every teacher was full of accolades - the only negative thing they had to say was that she'd been sick and missed class... and then they elaborated to say that it's not just a hassle having her turn in work late or miss a lecture but that she's a very vocal member of the classroom and has a unique view she's not afraid to assert and so her presence is extremely valuable.

It's always nice to hear other people appreciate your child and offer up a different perspective. I happen to think she's pretty cool, most people I know think the same thing. Actually, side note, somehow we both managed to be invited to the same Halloween party, separately, this year. Usually, it's like hey, you come and she can come too - or she should come and bring her Mom if she wants... but this year it was directed at each of us, separately.

Anyway, back to today - one of her teacher's commented that she's got an ability to assert her views, back them up with startling insight, then listen to divergent views and either absorb a bit or address why they don't impact her opinion. I'm relaying this because, as he mentioned, it's not every adult that knows how to truly listen and he was impressed... and so am I.

I'm not too fond of these "last ever" milestones. I enjoy being a Mom. I'll still be a Mom, but it'll be a different phase. I don't know for sure which country he Kid'll be in next year - not too sure which country I'll be in, although I think it's fairly safe to assume it'll be this one - and even though in most respects she's an adult right now, I'm not too comfortable when I think about the upcoming changes, and not really having as involved a role in her life as I have... which is funny, actually, as I'm not "overly" involved parent right now - I've raised a kid I trust and respect and who has an ingrained sense of responsibility (regarding homework, not housework) and she is pretty free to do what she wants when and how - she's not given me reason to doubt her honesty or question her freedom or level of autonomy, rather she continues to earn my trust and respect. I do occasionally say "no" or veto an idea or point out other issues that may impact her ideas, but not too often. I don't arrange her schedule or dictate her plans, I'm not a fussy Mom, always in her space, rummaging through her things, questioning her friends... so losing the few "Mom" things I do have isn't easy. Marking off these last ever parenting events with my one and only isn't all that much fun. I'm happy for her, she's growing up and has become and will continue to become this amazingly awesome talented beautiful being, but it's making me a little sad inside, going through these final phases.

Maybe I should get a dog and start puppy school so I have some sort of continue parenting experience I can participate in.

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